god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
she peed on how many people?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Bring me that man meat
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
