I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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