Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
We had sex on a dog bed..
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
