And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
