What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
