and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
i believe in u and ur pee
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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