It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
