What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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