NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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