HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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