It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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