I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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