I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
