I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
