This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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