No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
