Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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