can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
