I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I AM VODKA MAN
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
