Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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