i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
