I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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