Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
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