What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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