i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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