YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
