You smell like stripper and shame
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize