my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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