Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
