is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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