addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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