But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
