Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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