How'd it feel making her break her religion?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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