1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
