I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Randomize
