Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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