nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
