Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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