I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize