did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
