My brain says no but my pants say off.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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