if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
