tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize