He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
