Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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