In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
