$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
