note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
