What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
