Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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