Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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